you and i

in my mind you were hollywood unbreakable

like all the applauded before you

that ended up in rehab before their third movie

but i think i'm more like wednesday than i realized
with a "how do you spell your sorrow?"
and "how long have you had chronic depression?"
and "you can't possibly be at your breaking point until midnight"

and it's ten thirty and my claws are out.
don't ask me my favorite color
if you don't plan on sticking around until winter shows us hers

god, we'd play head games with loose change

today looks black
and i'm not talking about the weather
i'm talking about the way your feet move

you're forgetful
and i'm vindictive

you're eight glasses of water a day
and i'm a sorry cup of gas station coffee

you're dead in the future
and i'm blood from the past

you're a flip of a coin
a spin of a racquet
a throw of the dice
heads or tails
yes or no

and i'm the angry outburst tied at 3-3 in the third

you're an adverb
but i'm the verb
you decide how it gets done
but i decide what gets done

you're a wave
but i'm the ocean
you're the top half
but i'm the bottom half

you're voted "hit and run"
in your high school yearbook
and i'm a lost cause
i'm the black sheep
and maybe we're more similar than we realize

you were a high school cheerleader
two senior proms in your back pocket
front porch kisses
dad reading the newspaper under the lamp
and i was a nobody

we both cut off all our hair at seventeen
and our parents hated it
but you always tell me it wasn't the same for you

it's not the same for me either
you told me i was faking my eating disorder
you told me i was lying to my therapist
you told me i deserved to be hit

you have a story

i have a story

goldilocks has a story

even if the three bears were an exaggeration

and she always liked her porridge hot

and i always loved you
but sometimes i don't like you

and i know you feel the same way about me